old guys are out walking.
First one says, "Windy,
Second one says, "No, its Thursday!"
one says, "So am I. Let's go get a beer."
man was telling his neighbor, "I
just bought a new hearing aid.
It cost me four thousand
but it's state of the art. It's perfect."
"Really," answered the neighbor. "What
kind is it?"
Morris, an 82 year-old man, went to the doctor to get
A few days later the doctor saw Morris
walking down the street with a gorgeous young woman
on his arm.
A couple of days later the doctor spoke to Morris and
said, "You're really doing great, aren't you?"
replied, "Just doing what you said, Doc:
'Get a hot mamma and be cheerful.'"
The doctor said, "I
didn't say that. I said, 'You've got a heart murmur.
A little old man
shuffled slowly into an ice cream parlor and pulled
slowly, painfully, up onto
a stool. After catching his
breath he ordered a banana split. The
waitress asked kindly, "Crushed nuts?" "
No," he replied, "arthritis."
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